Let’s agree to disagree!


Can there be a day without a conflict? Sounds difficult, perhaps impossible! Conflict could be too strong a word to describe this state of mind but minor differences of opinion are part and parcel of our day-to-day lives. It’s very difficult for two individuals to agree in totality always. Be it social, domestic or even professional, all interpersonal relationships work on the uniform principle, “Let’s agree to disagree.”  When you can’t agree and not argue as well, all you can do is to agree to disagree. Forget with the other person, it’s even tough to agree with oneself. However hard you try to agree, mind will always put you in a conflicting situation!
Once it seemed happening to me. One fine day, I found it hard to agree with people. Everything was as usual. No specific disturbances to play a spoilsport, neither was there any reason to disagree every time. Nevertheless, it appeared that all I had to offer to others that day was an opposite view! Of course, I didn’t sound it across always.  For others, it looked as peaceful and routine as it usually would.  It was weighing on my mind all the day that something was wrong with me. I am not the person who would argue or at least stretch an argument too far. Each of us possesses a reasonable degree of understanding, and perhaps, that’s what saves us from half the potential clashes.
Leave others for a while; I told myself but I was unable to do it. Oh, your fundamental disagreement is with yourself, the same conflicting mind made me aware of the fact hitting the nail right on its head.
What difference does it make if we don’t agree with ourselves? It’s better to take it easy and relax instead of exhausting yourself with the thought. If it’s not necessary we would always agree with ourselves, the same applies to our disagreements with others. To each his own appears the best mantra.
And why is it necessary for you to be heard and adhered to all the time? Conflicts are inevitable part of everyday life. Husband-wife, boss-subordinate, parent-child, no one can be perfectly in sync with another. All one needs to do it to leave it to others what they want to do.
Once, my mom ringed me to discuss some family matters. She concluded on a note, “All parents are tired. Today’s children are giving nightmares. It’s a new tension all of us are living with…”I was wondering if children are giving nightmares or parents feel shaken with their own ideas of ‘ideal life.’ Generation gap is just part of a larger conflict, as everybody is hell-bent on one’s own views.
Conflict cannot tame conflict. Arguments will leave more scope for disagreement. What needs to be done for calming your mind down? Nothing. Attempts at it may create further problems. Some people meditate or try every possible way to calm themselves down and eventually get more rattled! It gets like catching a falling leaf. It slips if you run after it and rests in your palm if you stay calm. Why make efforts for something which has to be effortless?
-KanChan
  

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