Candid Confession!

It feels nice to return to the blog after a long gap. Ample time, topics aplenty but somehow writing didn’t happen. I have to be honest. I made a couple attempts yet nothing worked and eventually, I gave up. “Writer’s block!” I had heard some making this excuse. I don’t believe in it. Rather than playing this card, I would rather tell the truth.
I was in a different state of mind. I was neither sad nor elated. I found myself unusually neutral. Neutrality is always striking for a strong opinionated individual like me. I couldn’t fathom what was wrong with me…
Of course, cough and cold existed but sickness wasn’t the reason. Everything seemed haywire for a couple of days. My ‘ideal’ lifestyle took a backseat. Until last week, I swear, I never skipped my exercise and Pranayama schedules. I love getting up early. However, on eight consecutive days when I didn’t see the sun rise, gym and Pranayama seemed high sounding phrases. For around three years despite hectic schedules, I didn’t have a slight headache or fever. Now, for the last few days, when I was sneezing and coughing frequently, I felt, was it the same me? Last week, I couldn’t write even a couple of lines and asked myself, was it the same me who loved writing?
I feared if it was a reverse progress. No it wasn’t…
It must be happening to each of us at some point. We feel a little down or sad for no reason. Don’t you feel at times that you are simply in no mood to speak to anyone or do anything? Perhaps, not many spare too much thought on the so-called this ‘nothingness’ of mind but it does affect everyone, knowingly or unknowingly. 
The other day, my aunt was complaining about her daughter losing interest in studies. She was perturbed because her daughter was a studious girl. Someone who loved study for hours was not keen on touching textbooks! While the aunt was contemplating taking her daughter to a counsellor, I asked her to speak to the gal. My cousin said there was no specific reason but she ‘didn’t feel like…”. We decided to let it rest there and soon the girl was back to studies and passed her board exams with flying colours.
Such phase comes in everyman’s life, I guess. Haven’t we observed our sportspersons and filmstars? After a peak performance, a sudden low appears and we can make out that the person is not at his/her best. Even an aggressive Sahwag struggles to time the ball. When Yuvi finds Stuart Broad tough to handle, we wonder if it’s the same batter who hit the lanky speedster for six sixes in an over. A superstar’s film flops and eyebrows go up.
Why celebs only? Each of us experiences this, doesn’t each? Amid achievement and progress, a phase comes where things just don’t fall in place. It looks as if everything has come to a standstill.
There couldn’t be a concrete solution to this but let’s not lose our heart when such a phase stares us in the face. Conviction in our potential can only help us regain that momentum.
-KanChan



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